Cherry is ready to talk about poly. I'm scared. Scared to be judged on all the non-conventions of the things I find desirable. We might be talking about this in a couple days over lunch. Eek!
My sister is reminding me to be myself and to be honest. If I'm excited and communicative in my answers the understanding will come through in time, and perhaps a much more real and deep emotional bond will strike up in relation to this topic. Cherry wants to know more about my views on poly, "other than that it's awesome;" thus all the potential answering on my part.
The freak out portion of this is that see-saw of "I don't want to break up" vs. "I need to do what's right for me."
And even if this is not an issue in our next conversation, that is the seed that might be birthed from it. Will anyone plant it, and where? That is the uncertain debate; and the emotional roller coaster.
Breathe, breathe, breathe... and drink some honey chamomile tea with potentially Yiddish writing on the tea box (wtf? how did that get into our cupboard?)
Breathe. Sleep. Must.
In other news, I made a hand out of candle wax. It was certainly enlightening and infinitely fun to play with hot wax from a candle dripping on my hand! I dripped lots onto the sink surface as well, to protect it from getting stained by the hair dye that was waiting to be rinsed out of my head at the time; worked like a charm. Double whammy!
Peace. Meaow.
